Mean Mommy Academy

{ keep hanging on }

2012-01-13T21:45:00.000-07:00

Saw this quote today, and thought I'd share it:

I loved it too much to not make a free printable. Feel free to print it off this 8x11 quote. I'm going to, for a daily reminder during the rest of this pregnancy. :) -xoxo

{ christmas is coming and i am getting fat }

2011-12-16T13:03:00.000-07:00

Christmas is almost here, and I am doing my yearly ritual of turning the radio station or using my handy 'skip' feature on Pandora when Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer starts playing.

And I only have 3 more months left 'till baby #3 comes! No, I don't dance interpretive jigs when I'm in my 3rd trimester. But I would if I could. ;)

I've finally finished my neighbor gifts, and I'm doing these again this year:

Peppermint mallows + hot cocoa instructions and label here.

Today I have the HUGE goal of putting the last of the Christmas decoration boxes back in the garage, only to be pulled out again in a few weeks. Seriously, this is a problem. And I keep tripping over the dang box. You'd think I would have put it away a while back, but you see, I just finished putting up the last of the decorations a couple days ago. I ROCK.

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Hope you all have a wonderful Christmas!

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{ updates }

2011-12-07T14:14:00.000-07:00

{and yet, probably not}

Oh, dear readers, has it been that long since I've last blogged?

I guess it has...

Why have I abandoned Mean Mommy Academy these past couple months? Let's blame it on life, pregnancy and THE BRAIN.

I've lost it.

My mind, that is. I can't think like a normal human being anymore. And the sad thing is, I am fully aware that I have lost my mind. It would be different if I was blissfully unaware that I forget things, but I am painfully reminded daily. DAILY people.

:: snacks that belong in my son's backpack are still on the counter AFTER I have dropped him off at school.

:: forgetting to tell Mr. Smith that said son needs to be picked up from the park and NOT the church after scouts is over, thus resulting in a panicked father who is about to call the authorities, but happened to call me first. True Story.

:: forgetting the names of my own children. They now answer to "You".

:: making biscuits for dinner and as I am adding the last ingredient, realize I was reading/making the wrong recipe. Who does that?!

:: forgetting to put on my Awesome Pants in the morning. Thus resulting in less-awesome days.

:: leaving the box of crafts to display at church in the truck. For all of church.

:: forgetting what things are called like protractor, tape measure, Bruce Willis...

:: don't even THINK about asking me what day it is. Actually you can right this second because it says on my computer.

:: I won't be surprised if one time I forget that the date and time is displayed on my computer.

:: I've always struggled with doing math without a calculator. I don't struggle anymore. I've completely hit a brick wall. And have forgotten where I keep the calculator.

:: I have managed to forget entire conversations.

:: and birthdays.

:: and names. {seriously, who forgets Bruce Willis??} ;)

...and the list goes on.

What crazy things has motherhood made you forget?

{ why i love my doctor's scale }

2011-08-31T16:58:00.001-07:00

I had a doctor appointment last Friday. It was scheduled at 11. But being a new patient, filling out paperwork made it so I didn't see the doc until a little later than that. Okay, almost an hour later.

I only had toast for breakfast, and the lady in the next room was talking about BBQ sandwiches and smoothies. I wanted to deck her. Even though I don't speak stomach, my tummy was screaming profanities, I'm sure of it.

I was then reminded that all this suffering would benefit me on the scale. {A.k.a. that wicked piece of machinery that was taunting me down the hall.}

You see, I was sure I had gained 10 pounds in the past couple months. I added a few more pounds to what my scale said, because doctor's scales always seem to add a good 3-5 pounds on your original weight. So I thus calculated.

I took off my shoes. I put down my bag. I stepped gingerly onto the black mat that would betray me in a few seconds. I didn't dare look.

But I have absolutely no power over my curiosity. {It's a curse, really.}

That beautiful scale read only 5 pounds of total weight gain. Five. I wanted to hug it, but refrained since people where watching. I was so happy.

And no, now is not the time to remind me that my stomach was empty and starving. I'm taking those only 5 pounds and running with them! ;)

What else did this appointment accomplish, other than boosting a girl's self-esteem? I now have a verified official reason to gain weight, and not because I love to eat food:

After years of trying, the Good Lord has finally blessed us with baby #3. So even though I may cry because of the nausea, headaches and cramps, they are happy tears! After having a miscarriage, I will gladly take all of these 'trials' if it means a healthy little person will be joining our family. Which reminds me of a quote:

:: via ::

Hope you all have a blessed rest of the week! -xoxo

{ my little love affair }

2011-08-23T13:17:00.000-07:00

My husband brought me home something I actually had never seen before. Something glorious. Something amazing. And the minute I laid eyes on it, this conversation entered my head:

"What's that?"
"This, my friend, is a pint."
"It comes in pints?"

Twenty-six and a half ounces to be exact. Even better. ;)

All one REALLY needs is a spoon.... xoxo

{What's your favorite way to eat Nutella?}

{ i've had better mornings }

2011-07-19T16:16:00.000-07:00

Today started out with:

"He's not eating his breakfast!"
"She won't leave me alone!"
"Don't smile at me!"
"Stop touching me!"
"He has mad eyes!"
"She punched me!"
"He's looking at me!"
"Stop!"
"Don't!"
"OUCH!"

Plus a bunch of sound affects:

Thump.
Whack.
Poke.
Stomp.
Crash.

And it has yet to stop.

Is 4pm too early to put my kids to bed???

Here's to tomorrow. --xoxo

{ how to write the perfect 80's song }

2011-07-15T14:27:00.000-07:00

I'm beginning to feel a little old. No, it's not the fact that I'm ready for bed when 9pm hits, or that the creases in my face that once only appeared when I would smile are now staying there all permanent-like, or the fact that I can't do front hand springs anymore without killing some part(s) of my body, or the fact that my bladder seems to be a lot smaller than it used to be. No, none of these things.

It's when I turn on the dang radio and flip to the "Oldies" station.

When the heck did it become ok to play Tears For Fears, Erasure, Depeche Mode, Soft Cell, Roxette, and other fabs on a station CLEARLY meant to play ONLY songs from a LONG time ago???

{Biting pillow} This is SO not okay with me.

But I came up with a solution that just might help me feel young again. I think someone needs to write an 80's song for me. A song that can be played on radio stations that only play young, hip and current musical compositions. If you are one of these beautiful souls who would love to do me this massive favor {and are willing to perm your hair}, I have a few guidelines that you need to follow:

:: Only use synthesizers and electric instruments. I feel that anything acoustic will taint the effect we are trying to achieve.

:: You MUST sing with an English accent. I cannot stress the importance of this.

:: You must choose between no vibrato or an insane amount of it. This is the ONLY guideline in which you will have a choice between two options.

:: There must be an electric guitar/synthesizer solo. Multiple synthesizers are not necessary, but they are wicked awesome and will earn you bonus points.

:: Obtain/get inspiration for your lyrics by attending a third grade poetry reading.

:: Feel free to write several songs like this, but once you have a hit, please don't write anymore. You must be able to qualify under the 'one-hit-wonder' category.

:: Because in 20 years, they will be doing a "Where Are They Now" reality TV show, and I would hate for you to miss out on the wonderful opportunity to be a part of that.

We can discuss clothing, the amount of hairspray to use, if "Static Pseudo Ninjas" is the perfect name for your band, and album covers later. Let's just get that perfect 80's song started.

Any takers?

Hope you all have a fabulous weekend- I'm off to restock my year supply of Aqua Net, then show my kids how to do 5 cartwheels in a row. Which may result in a visit to Urgent Care. {Hey, as long as it produces rockin' blogging material, it's worth it, right?} --xoxo

p.s. - what would you name your faux 80's band?

:: image source ::

{ jam-filled butter cookies }

2011-07-07T21:10:00.000-07:00

Summer is the time for taking breaks. As in, I seriously need a break from saying "Stop fighting, you two". If only I had a dollar for every time I said that- I think I could pay cash for a mansion.

In order to keep the fighting down to a minimum 5 times a day, we have to keep busy. And although I hate heating up my house, one of the things the kids love to do is to watch me make cookies. I say watch because they end up fighting over who gets to put in what, who gets to turn on the mixer, who gets to grab the egg, etc. So I let them sit on the bar stools and WATCH. Then they both get a beater if they don't touch each other/invade each other's personal space bubble during the mixing process. (I have a Bosch, which has two beaters- bless them for designing it that way.)

These are hands down our family's favorite cookies. I am constantly getting requests for them from the hubby and kids, and they are ridiculously fast and easy to make. No lie.

Here's the ridiculously easy recipe:

Sometimes I get lazy and don't separate the eggs, and then add a touch more flour. And I use a mini ice-cream scooper instead of rolling the dough into balls when the cookies are just for us and will not be seen by outsiders. ;-] But seriously, these are delicious and are gone in a heartbeat. Also, do NOT over-cook them. They will still look dough-y, but if you touch the tops and they are hard, they're done. If you want to get super fancy, sprinkle powdered sugar on top after they have cooled.

Hope you all are trying to survive in the Summer Heat! --xoxo

{ 7 . 04 . 2011 }

2011-07-04T08:54:00.004-07:00

:: image ::

Hoping you all have a Happy and Safe Fourth Of July!!

Feeling so blessed to live in a free country... --xoxo

{ new winner }

2011-06-30T12:42:00.000-07:00

I haven't been contacted by the My Memories Giveaway winner, so please check this post to see who the new winner is. --xoxo

{ my memories winner }

2011-06-21T10:07:00.003-07:00

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Thanks to random . org, the winner of the My Memories Giveaway is commenter number 2!

Congrats to Lachelle! Email me at jordanriverblossom @ yahoo . com and I'll send you your download code!

Thanks to all who entered! ~~Don't forget MMA readers can still get $10 off the~~ ~~My Memories Digital Software~~ ~~by using the code~~ ~~STMMMS8272~~ ~~when checking out! {Please note that this code~~ ~~expires on June 23rd~~.} They also have a bunch of kits and papers that are free! You don't need the software to use them, if you have photoshop or any other paint program, you can still use them to create pages, calendars, cards, etc.

I threw together this card together real quick as an example of how simple and easy it is:

:: I'm dying over the cute aqua circle background paper. Love. It. ::

Hope you all have a great week! --xoxo

{ why you can't play yu-gi-oh at our house }

2011-06-16T17:08:00.001-07:00

It's not that I'm against the Yu-gi-oh card game. My son loves it. And it gets his imagination working. But the rules make no sense whatsoever. So when it comes to this game at our house, we don't play by the rules. We make them up.

The numbers on the cards mean nothing.

The icons on the cards mean nothing.

The special abilities listed on the cards mean nothing.

All that is required to play is a bunch of bull. Straight up. And the fact that you have watched the cartoon show at least once to know the lingo. {Yes, it only takes one episode to figure that out.} Numbers are made up. Special abilities, weapons and magic defenses are created on the spot. Life/attack points only depend on what your opponent just said, meaning, you go bigger and better. And you must be able to create your own sound effects. Although, singing your own background music is optional. {I award myself extra life points when I compose my own theme song while playing. True story.}

The names of the creatures/monsters on the cards are the only thing we go by.

So you see, if you are a real Yu-gi-oh card player {or firmly believe that one must play every game by the exact rules}, you can't play with us. We would drive you insane.

All others are welcome.

Provided you bring a heaping of bull honkey to the table. --xoxo

{ my memories giveaway }

2011-06-13T16:58:00.001-07:00

*closed*

Winner announced at this post.

Everything has gone digital. From photos and videos, to books and journaling. I must say I'm a fan of digital journaling. I used to love scrapbooking, but the time it took to pull everything out and make just one page was ridiculous. Let alone you have to clean it all up when you're done.

And since we're being honest, it would take me days to clean it up.

So I gave it up years ago.

Now my pictures sit on my computer, in one big file, loads of them, unorganized, and crying for attention. No seriously. I'm scared to start the organizing process. I would rather do laundry.

*snort* Ok- that's a lie. ;)

But last fall I discovered the magical land of digital photo books. Yes, I realize they've been around for awhile, but I had never actually sat down and played around with it's many options. Oh my goodness, I will now be making photo books for the rest of my life! No more glue dots! No more scissors! No more major math skills! And best of all? No more guilt for not documenting my children's lives! It truly is freedom.

New to the digital scrapbooking world? Wanna give it a go? Are you an expert looking for more resources? Then you'll want to enter this giveaway! My Memories.com has generously offered one of Mean Mommy Academy's lucky readers a chance to win their digital scrapbooking software program! This is such a fun program that lets you create everything from scrapbook pages to calendars, cards to posters, even interactive videos you can share with family and friends! I've been busy creating screen savers and desktop wallpapers:

:: my desktop image for next month ::

~~Want to enter?~~ ~~Here are your instructions~~ ~~{mandatory} :~~

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~~Go to~~ ~~MyMemories.com, then come back and leave a comment here telling me what your favorite paper, embellishment or digital scrapbooking kit is!~~

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Here are just two of mine:

:: lined journal cards & sweet vintage papers ::

~~See how easy? But what about additional entries, you ask? Okay. Here ya go {please leave a separate comment for each one completed} :~~

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:: 1 :: ~~Become a follower of Mean Mommy Academy via google friend connect~~

:: 2 :: ~~'Like' My Memories on~~ ~~Facebook~~.

:: 3 :: ~~Tweet or Facebook about this giveaway. {Include your twitter link and I'll re-tweet! (: }~~
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~~You have until June 20th {midnight} to enter~~ ~~-- I will announce the winner Tuesday, June 21st!~~

Want to get started right away? MyMemories.com is giving all MMA readers $10 off their My Memories Digital Suite Software purchase by using the code: STMMMS8272 when checking out. But you need to hurry! This code expires on June 23rd.

Good luck! --xoxo

*all images made with the My Memories Suite digital software.

{ welcome, sweet angel }

2011-06-06T19:17:00.000-07:00

Congrats to my cousin Camryn! Her precious angel arrived safe and sound. Isn't she GORGEOUS?? Kinda makes you want one, huh? ;)

{ planning a camping trip }

2011-06-02T10:15:00.000-07:00

At the present moment, I have a girl-crush on Mother Nature. Usually by this time, I am cursing her and the heat she brings for summer. But not this year. She has spoiled us down here in the valley of the sun.

But that doesn't mean one doesn't need to plan a retreat to the mountains for a little R&R. I'm so excited! I'm a camping girl. I love camp fires, nature walks, and being away from all the hubbub of life. I love it all...

Except for the planning/packing part. I'm ALWAYS forgetting something, or not planning completely. So I decided that for this trip I would make up a checklist. And of course I'll share it with you! :)

{Click on the image and save it to your computer}

Here's a part of what mine will look like when filled {except with much worse handwriting}:

And now I have plenty of time to fill it in as I think of stuff, and I'm not trying to rack my brain AS we're packing up the truck. This is going to be HUGE for me.

So what things do you take on your camping trips that most people forget? Any tips or tricks? I'd love to hear them! --xoxo

{ tinkering around }

2011-05-21T17:07:00.000-07:00

I don't have a real post this week because I am ~~wasting my time~~ just playing around with my layout. I've added the Pages Gadget to the top, changed my twitter and email me buttons, etc. So I thought I would write up a little post real quick about some changes you might not be aware of:

:: Did you know you can get MMA's posts directly to your inbox?

:: You can find me on twitter, pinterest, instagram and blogfrog. Are you there, too?

And since I'm playing around with Blogger this weekend, is there a feature that you would like to see added to Mean Mommy Academy's site? Any specific questions?

Hope you all have a fabulous weekend! --xoxo

{ happy monday }

2011-05-16T13:35:00.000-07:00

It's a good day.

Despite the fact that my son is claiming a stomach ache and was sent home from school.

He's fine. But as 'precaution' the nurse said I may just want to keep him home for the rest of the day {because there actually is a stomach bug going around}. My son is rejoicing...

Because it's Daddy's birthday. And any child who thinks they might be missing out on birthday festivities would have a little stomach ache. My hubby is rejoicing...

Not because he enjoys his children being sick, but because he texted me this morning and asked if I wanted to just keep him home from school so we could hang out as a family. And being the mean mom that I am, I said no- he hasn't reached his reading goal and needs to be there every day until the end of the school year.

*sigh* I guess I lost this battle. ;)

So Happy Birthday to my sweetheart. Here's hoping to celebrate a million more birthdays with him!

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Also, check out Mean Mommy University today- it's a sweet post about her hubby graduating. Congrats to him and to her- I agree that they should award the spouses an honorary degree for their patience and support. Way to go Mr and Mrs The Camryn! Sending virtual hugs your way!

See? I told you it was a good day. --xoxo

{ mother's day recap }

2011-05-13T12:27:00.002-07:00

I had a wonderful Mother's Day. And Mother's Day Eve.

I firmly believe that on Mother's Days and Birthdays, one should be able to take the entire week {or at the very least, the entire weekend} to celebrate these holidays.

Mr. Smith was so cute. Even though he had already given me some flowers on Mother's Day Eve, he couldn't wait until Sunday for me to open my presents. It KILLED him when I made him wait until that evening. I love that man...

He took the kids out so I could have 'My Time' on Saturday. That right there would have made this Mother's Day the best ever. Don't ask why I spent it doing dishes and cleaning, but I did. Love my family, but their idea of clean, and my idea of clean are completely different.

Sunday was spent going to church in the morning {which was fabulous- the speakers where amazing}, finding out my daughter thinks I am either 16 or 36 {I pick 16} with really black hair {I'm going to set up an appointment with the optometrist}, then coming home and starting Mother's Day Lunch.

With strawberries dipped in cream cheese {fondue style} as dessert, how could one go wrong??

And then I had the privilege of reading my son's booklet he made in school. Here's a list of things he thinks about me:

:: my mom is a woman tall.

:: she probably weighs about me pounds. {I'm flattered he thinks I weigh as much as he does. He earned extra computer time for this answer.}

:: my mom works at stof {aka: stuff, which is remarkably accurate.}

:: I think this is how much money my mom earns every day, $10. {I suspect he was referring to how much a charge a piano lesson. Yeah, let's go with that one.}

:: for fun my mom likes to play a game.

:: the job at home that my mom hates doing the most is working. {again, this is remarkably accurate.}

:: the job she likes the best is working. {wait a minute...}

:: if my mom had a million dollars, she would buy a new backpack. {umm... who are we talking about?}

:: the best present I could give my mom would be a braslite. {aka: bracelet. And I would love anything he gives me.}

:: her favorite sport is swening {aka: sewing. Did you not know sewing is a sport? Are you not familiar with the Olympic relay sewing race?? The competition is crazy-- looking for a few sponsors.}

:: her favorite color is green. {true story}

:: favorite pet is a puppy. {well, it's a close second. I'll still give him the point.}

:: favorite food is pizza. {did this turn into a father's day booklet all of a sudden?}

:: favorite animal is a bollfin. {aka: dolphin. Darn those lowercase 'b's and 'd's. And that sneaky 'ph' combo.}

:: favorite TV show is chanll 23. {now even though channel is spelled phonetically, this answer made me laugh so hard. Because it's true. Channel 23 is the Discovery Channel, which I am now publicly admitting, is one of my favorites. I have a slight obsession with Mythbusters, Man Woman Wild, Dirty Jobs, etc.}

:: favorite book to read to me is binotruck. {curse you, lowercase 'b's and 'd's!!}

:: favorite game to play with me is huggere hippose. {aka: hungry hippos and he cheats.}

:: favorite thing to do for fun is sports. {aka: sitting on my rear eating cinnamon bears.}

All-in-all, I'm pretty impressed with what my son came up with. And his cute illustrations that accompanied {please note the amazing accuracy of the thinness of my thighs *wink*}:

Hope all you moms had a fantastic Mother's Day! --xoxo

{ guest posting @ i love the way she blogs }

2011-04-27T09:38:00.000-07:00

:: My Blogging Mantra ::

When I first began blogging, I wanted to have a snazzy looking blog. I wanted it to look cool like the other blogs out there. But I had no idea how to get from point A to point B.

And it took quite a while to get there. I look back at some of my blog layouts and cringe wondering what I was thinking! I laugh because I was so proud of it at the time. It was something I created all by myself. Back then I thought I was a bloggy creating genius.

{FYI : The more you learn, the more you realize you don't know.}

I'm still learning, and I'm loving every minute.

{Except for the times I'm ~~crying~~ getting teary-eyed (because it just isn't working how I want it to) and my hubby is staring at me wondering what the heck is wrong with me.}

Lilly, from i love the way she blogs, contacted me a little while ago asking if I would guest post on her blog. The crazy thing is, she was one of the blogs I frequently searched/stalked when it came to learning how to create a blog I was proud of. So you can imagine my excitement! I quickly replied yes, and you can read my guest post here. I wrote about how I started, my back-pocket magic card named Google, and the evolution of my blog. A few pointers here and there. Check it out, and also the rest of her blog. She has wonderful, easy to follow tips and tutorials that will be a lifesaver for you if you are determined to design your own blog. She's definitely one to have in your Google Reader. ;) --xoxo

{ working with Love Without Boundaries }

2011-04-26T12:47:00.001-07:00

For the past couple weeks, I have been so honored to work with a wonderful foundation called Love Without Boundaries in creating their new Mother's Day Celebration Bracelets.

Love Without Boundaries provides amazing help to orphaned children in China by means of medical help, education, foster help, orphanage assistance, etc. These children are receiving these resources through the help of those who have the ability to donate and share of their means.

Take a minute to visit the Love Without Boundaries website, and see the wonderful things they are accomplishing, and the children who's lives they are changing. And then count your blessings. Hug your children tight. I know times are hard for us right now, and I know there are people out there who are living paycheck to paycheck, hoping that they have enough to just pay the bills and feed their families. But if you are one of the fortunate people who have a bit more to give, please consider a donation to this fantastic foundation.

For more information on how to donate, and receive a Mother's Day Celebration Bracelet, please head over to LWB.

Have a great week! --xoxo

{ easter weekend }

2011-04-23T11:21:00.000-07:00

Amid the egg-dying, ham baking, jelly-bean-and-chocolate-consuming, may we all take a minute this Easter to remember our Savior and His Sacrifice.

He bled and died for us.

And was Resurrected.

I Know He Lives.

Happiest Easter to you all. --xoxo

{ camryn's corner }

2011-04-18T20:32:00.000-07:00

And you thought Camryn was having a baby.

Read her funny account over at Mean Mommy University. Her girls make me giggle-- I love the way kid's minds work! It's amazing the things they come up with, their reasoning, and their philosophies. The world makes so much sense and is explained so simply.

Ah, to be young again... ;)

Have an amazing week! --xoxo

*original image*

{ my new venture :: pearsnickity :: }

2011-04-14T11:00:00.001-07:00

Once upon a time, there was a girl. A girl who went shopping. And this girl came across an beautiful bag, sitting on a table, calling her name. {And she was fairly certain Angels were singing} As she hurried over to the bag, like they do in the movies with Chariots of Fire playing in the background, her heart was beating, knowing she had found True Love.

And then, with a sudden blow, her dreams were crushed. Smashed. Destroyed in the instant it takes one to turn over the price tag.

No. This bag was not for her.

But she dreamed. She dreamed of being reunited with that Straw Beauty.

And then she found something else. Something that didn't cause heart attacks when one flipped over the price tag. In fact, it would make Angels sing again. So she grabbed one, and took it home with her. The bag wasn't much now, but with a teeny make-over it would be alluring.

And it was. A ruffle here, a flower there: this bag was turning out better than she could even hope for, and for a fraction of a fraction of the Bag At The Store's price.

And that's where the lightbulb turned on. Why should she be selfish? Why shouldn't she make a bunch for the entire world to enjoy? {Or at least North America?} And she could still sell them at a fraction of the price while making enough for her time. She made a bunch and decided to call her new "shop":

And that, my dear bloggy friends, is what happened. And I am now reaching out to you. I experimented with friends and family and got great results. So I'm trying out a new business venture. While supplies last. I'd like to introduce you to: The Lakeside Market Tote

{in cream}

And her sisters:

Each bag measures 12" wide, 10" tall, and 4" deep. All come with navy blue lining. {That's how the straw bags originally come, and since I'm not experienced in the art of grass weaving to make my own bags, I'm stuck with that color. ;) } As of right now {since this venture is strictly in the experimental stages}, I can only ship to the continental US via First Class mail. Hopefully this will change!

Only $15!

These bags are perfect for Easter or Mother's Day. Do you know someone who needs some Ruffly Arm Candy? --xoxo

{In the event that the Paypal button is not working, please email me @ pearsnickity(at)yahoo(dot)com}

{ is your smart phone endangering your kids? }

2011-04-01T00:06:00.002-07:00

There's this feature on every smart phone that is quite handy. It's called geotagging. It's quite necessary, as one needs it for accessing the maps, for using any app that searches for things nearby {restaurants, theaters, gas stations, etc.}, or anything else that needs to know your exact location to better serve you.

But this amazing bit of technology has a dark side.

Yeah, That dark.

Camryn sent me an email earlier and I'm so glad she did. I had no idea that this was even possible. You may have seen this already, but I thought it was worth the post if even if only to make one other reader aware.

How your smart phone may be putting the safety of your children at risk:

Did you know that geotagging is also equipped into your camera? I didn't either. Every time you take a picture, it records the exact place you took it at. And when you put that picture on the interenet {blog, facebook, twitter, etc.} that location is still attached to your picture.

You may freak out now. I sure did. Watch this:

But this can all be avoided. The website I Can Stalk You: raising awareness about inadvertent information sharing gives you step-by-step tutorials on how to change your settings so your pictures are no longer geotagged.

So grab your smart phones, and change those settings! {I was pleasantly relieved to see that mine was already turned off. *whew!*} And spread the word. Let's keep our families safe. --xoxo

*image source*

{ camryn's corner }

2011-03-28T22:49:00.000-07:00

Before I begin, I want to state, for the record, that I will never make fun or laugh at someone with a speech disorder. But little children who pronounce things wrong while they are learning and growing, is an entirely different matter. It's innocently cute. It's laughably adorable. Hop on over to Camryn's blog to see her daughter's new toy, and what she calls it.

It's a crab. And she pronounces her 'b's, 'p's. ;)

Hope you all have a fantastic week! --xoxo

{ just thought you should know }

2011-03-23T21:36:00.000-07:00

It makes me smile. Have you realized how amazing you are today? --xoxo

:: photo source ::

{ my love for scentsy : the celtic love knot }

2011-03-17T12:45:00.023-07:00

Dearest BFF's {yes, I consider us BFF's},

Are you familiar with a fantastic company called Scentsy?? Please tell me you are aware they exist, because they are seriously The. Bomb. That's right. I just said The. Bomb. If you are unaware of their marvelous products, then let me give you a little rundown:

Scentsy was so unbelievably kind to send me this Celtic Love Knot warmer to try out and review. Hello. LOVE. Isn't it gorgeous? And perfect for some St. Patty's Day decor. ;) And the scentsy bars are amazing. I was sent the Sunkissed Citrus and Lilacs & Violets.

Um, my house smells like heaven. At least I hope it's what heaven smells like.

The Scentsy warmer and bars are seriously a great alternative to open flames, especially with small children. The warming dish does get pretty warm, and I keep it out of the reach of my kids, but I can stick it in places I would have an issue placing a good smelling candle. And did you know they have tiny wall plug-in warmers? Good grief, it's awesome...

I'm telling ya, if you're one of the lucky ladies to have a hubby that sometimes 'forgets' to take out the trash, or if your home lies downwind from the cow farm a few miles away which on certain days is unnaturally pungent, then you may want to consider on of these puppies. Seriously saved my nose on more than one occasion.

Do you own a Scentsy warmer? What is/are your favorite scents? I'm dying to know- I need smelly referrals... ;)

Stay tuned as I am planning on sending one lucky reader one of my favorite Scentsy Bars. But for now:

--xoxo

{ celebrate the beautiful }

2011-03-09T22:19:00.000-07:00

Today I wanted to focus on beauty. And not the type of beauty that Hollywood has drilled into our brains, but beautiful, God-given, natural beauty. I decided to take my camera with me {a.k.a. cell phone} and capture the special, little things throughout the day that made my heart sparkle.

Today I wanted to focus on the positive.

Today I wanted to focus on my blessings.

Today I wanted to focus on celebrating the beautiful.

Because I was feeling very NOT.

Do you have a 'NOT' voice in your head? I sure do. It tells me what I am not, who I am not, and what I have not. And I hate it. That little voice has been growing very obnoxious lately, so today I decided to try and drown it out: by searching for the positive and ignoring that little voice whenever it would decide to try and pop up. And believe me, it tried. And is still trying. But hopefully as I practice celebrating the positive, my blessings and the beauty all around me, it's voice will become less and less, 'till it's just a tiny whisper.

:: TODAY'S BEAUTY ::

01:: Sweet children that let me sleep in this morning

02:: Being able to feel better about cereal for breakfast because bananas exist

03:: Long, warm, interruption-free showers

04:: Early morning sand castle building {thank you high of 82°}

05:: My daughter's free daily smiles. No expiration. No quantity limits.

06:: Snuggles and Stories

07:: Eternal Love

08:: Being able to see the beauty around me

09:: Dear friends {a.k.a. angels} who have been so generous to me throughout my life

10:: A working radio and a daughter who asks me to turn it down so she can hear *me* singing

11:: Witnessing a young boy being able to sight read a song perfectly for the first time in his life

12:: My favorite fruits on killer sale: grapefruit, Fuji apples and strawberries

There were so many other things that made me smile today, but I didn't want this post to be a novel. Someday I will show you the pinecone bird feeder my son made in scouts and the beautiful finches that dine from it, or the tall trees that grace our front sidewalk, or the homework that my son did without complaining so he could put a sticker on the magical sticker chart. It truly was a beautifully blessed day. --xoxo

How do you Celebrate The Beautiful in your life?

{ camryn's corner }

2011-03-07T21:47:00.003-07:00

Are you a vegetarian? Have you ever had solicitors? Why in the world am I asking these questions, and what do they have in common?

I personally love a good orange chicken dish from Panda Express. But if I knew that being a vegetarian would save me from solicitors, then I may flirt with the idea....

Check out Camryn's post about how her food choices saved her from a very blunt salesman, and the other crazy stunts people have tried at her front door. I think you'll be nodding your head in agreement on some of them. What's the craziest thing a salesman has said, done or offered on your front steps?

*photo credit*

{ moms supporting a mom }

2011-03-06T20:46:00.014-07:00

I want you to meet a friend of mine. Her name is Jodie Masiwchuk, and she is an amazing person. She is also a wife, mother and a cartoon artist. She is the mastermind behind the comic strip Suburban Sarah.

I love the humor she brings to her comics, a humor that most women and mommies can relate too. It's so nice to read her stuff and realize that our trials and joys, our ups and downs are very similar.

She writes, "I find that there are many other mothers like my main character Sarah--college educated, smart, funny, and looking for a certain amount of support and camaraderie when it comes to raising a child, being a woman and getting older. My hope is that Suburban Sarah, in it's own small way, will bring that support to it's audience."

Jodie draws her cartoons to support us as women and mothers, and now it's our turn to support her back. :) She is entering a contest in which the winner will receive a development contract the Creators Syndicate. If Jodie is able to get this, she can get her foot in the door in providing even more people with her work, and doing what she loves.

And she needs our votes.

Here's what you can do to help her out:

1 :: You have to create an account- don't let this scare you- it's to prevent ballot stuffing and make it completely fair for the contestants. It is not an email list and your email will not be sold. You can quickly create your account by clicking here.

2 :: Go to their home page, thecartooniststudio.com.

3 :: Click on voting is now open.

4 :: Look for Suburban Sarah (or go here), then click 'like' underneath that.

See? Simple! (You may repeat up to 4 times a day, every 6 hours.)

I love to see good people get rewarded for helping others. Jodie has been drawing Suburban Sarah for the public for free, and I think she deserves to win for trying bringing a little sunshine and laughter into mom's lives. (Which is very much needed) ;)

I've written about her work before, so this is not a plug to get paid. I did not receive anything for this post. I'm just trying to help out a friend by spreading the word. :)

So let me thank you in advance- and I'm sure Jodie will send you gobs of virtual hugs too! Good luck Jodie!! --xoxo

*all illustrations from Suburban Sarah . com and used with permission*

{ mommy carnival }

2011-03-03T11:45:00.007-07:00

This morning I woke up to sweet children helping each other make breakfast. A bowl of cereal with a healthy dose of Strawberry Milk on the side.

It was so sweet how they were trying to be quiet as not to wake me, and their whispers were full of let me help you's and want me to do that for you's. There were even a bunch of please and thank you's.

Proud mommy moment for sure.

And then ten minutes go by. (Ah. You know where I'm going with this)

I'm upstairs pulling out my contact solution to begin the process of inserting pieces of plastic into my nearly blind eyes, when I hear my daughter crying. Not the fake "He touched me" cry, but real tears. As I hurry to see what the issue is, I find a little girl with a slightly bloody lip.

I think I get a couple gold stars for not flying off the handle. I interrogated the boy to find out what happened. The story went down like this:

"She tried to destroy my lego robot I made. She was bothering me."

"Did you hit her?" (Completely obvious, but I was giving him the chance to tell the truth)

"Yes. She made me so mad."

Both went to time-out. Why both? Because she does that to him ALL the time. She is the biggest stinker/tease, and lately she's been getting worse. (Pray for me?)

I feel like my life as a Mommy is one big carnival. Except for the fact that I wanted to ride the Tunnel of Love and not the Roller Coaster of Emotional Drama. What happened after time-out? Oh, they were hugging and laughing again. See what I mean? Roller. Coaster.

*don't mock the awesome visual aid - you know you love it*

What Mommy Carnival Ride are you on? Ferris Wheel? Carousel? Bumper Cars? I think the trick is learning to laugh on these rides. Some scream. I don't want to be a screamer (even though it may APPEAR that my handy illustration depicts me as such). I want to be a 'Whoo-hoo!' -er.

And I for sure don't want to be a vomiter.

Here's hoping for more whoo-hoo-ing! --xoxo

{ camryn's corner }

2011-03-01T09:08:00.003-07:00

Do you feel like you're driving around in a trash compactor? Are you mortified when you drop your kids off at school, praying the teachers standing there won't glance your way when the door opens, or try and park so they aren't standing down-wind?

Camryn has a hilarious story over at Mean Mommy University. And she has a name for her problem.... JIM.

I'll be back later- I had the awesome opportunity to review a stellar product! {I know, who says stellar anymore. Um, apparently me.} --xoxo

Thanks again to all who entered the CSN Stores.com giveaway. The winner was announced on that post. :)

{ new and improved little piggies }

2011-02-24T18:14:00.010-07:00

The other night, my daughter wanted to play 5 Little Piggies. You know, the one where you pinch the toes? I went to start the "This little piggie..." process, and she wailed that SHE wanted to do it to me. So I let her. I think she may have forgot the words, because they were not what I remembered them being. Or maybe she thought the original was lame, so she decided to come up with her own version. Ladies and Gentlemen, here is Em's version of The 5 Little Piggies {with completely necessary and colorful illustrations by yours truly}:

This Little Piggie stayed home.
This Little Piggie went to her mother's.
This Little Piggie said, "Oh poop".
This Little Piggie said a naughty word and had to go to time-out.
And This Little Piggie said "WWWWWWEEEEEEEEE!!!!"

I enjoyed her version. Tons more fun. But, is this a reflection of what goes on in our home? Good gracious, I hope not. Um, no. It is not. My mother lives a whole state away.

And we never say naughty words in our home. *cough* *cough*

And why would my amazingly behaved children EVER throw flour around?

Nope. Never happens. It must be someone else's family she was referring to.

;)

Hope you and your piggies have a great weekend! --xoxo

ps- don't forget to enter the CSN Stores.com Giveaway- there's still time!!!

{ another fantastic CSN stores giveaway! closed }

2011-02-17T20:35:00.010-07:00

Are you in the market for home office furniture, mirrors, spoons or even plumbing supplies? Well CSN Stores.com has everything you could ever need. Including the Kitchen Sink. With over 200 online stores, this is definitely your place for one stop shopping.

And I would like to help you shop. {It's a girl thing.} ;)

CSNStores.com has generously offered {again} to give one of my lucky readers a $40 gift code! {You may squeal now because this is awesome.} ~~Here's how to enter:~~

~~Leave a comment. Any comment will do as long as it's G-rated. ;) Tell me about your day, what you would buy if you won, your favorite kind of chocolate - anything.~~
~~For those interested in an additional entry/chance to win, let me know in a separate comment if you are a follower.~~

Simple as that.

~~You have until Sunday, February 27th {midnight} to enter.~~ I will announce the winner Monday the 28th.

Best of Luck Everyone!! --xoxo

FYI: please be aware that this is a one-time use, online code. There may be shipping charges, or, if you're in Canada, international fees for certain products.

*Winner Update *

Congratulations to Mindy who is commenter #21! I will email you your code of awesomeness! :)

Thank you again to all who entered!! I wish you all could win... :(

{ happy valentine's }

2011-02-14T18:23:00.007-07:00

I woke up this morning to two of the most beautiful things in the world: Homemade Valentine's from my two darlings. Just for me. Configured and built all on their own.

I guess they picked up on how much I loved them, because a little while later, a whole family of hearts was born, and I found them adorning the front of our tv.

Hope you all had a heart-filled Valentine's Day! --xoxo

{ fyi : a bit about myself }

2011-02-08T20:21:00.012-07:00

So I was tagged by cute Rachy over at Happily Ever Now, and she asked me to share 15 facts about myself.

So dear readers, here you go. And in a handy numbered list no less.

01:: I am Five Feet Tall. That's it.

02:: I claim 5'1" on my driver's license.

03:: I am the oldest of 5 children: 4 girls and 1 boy.

04:: My brother is just fine: he survived the severe estrogen levels by being highly favored by our mother. {He dresses really well, though. I would like to take credit for that.}

05:: I won't lie when I say that I am ecstatic about the fact that my daughter loves to watch She-Ra.

06:: My favorite author is C.S. Lewis. Hands down.

07:: I was homeschooled.

08:: I've been considering hair extensions/body perm/rogaine for the past few years now- yes, my hair really is that thin.

09:: My son has a communication/speech disorder.

10:: I love him, but it tests my patience. And I'm a pretty patient person.

11:: My daughter is Pure. Sass. Look it up in the dictionary: you will see her picture.

12:: I don't cuss, but I did call my hubby a Jack A** once when I was really mad at him.

13:: Okay. Twice.

14:: I teach piano lessons every day after school.

15:: I was born in Arizona, raised in Utah, and then moved back down to the Valley of the Sun almost 4 years ago. I'm thinking I much prefer the scorching heat to the freezing snow...

Do you have 15 Fun Facts about yourself? I'd love to hear them! Post them on your blog and leave me your link in the comments section so I can come visit! --xoxo

{ camryn's corner }

2011-02-07T14:54:00.005-07:00

Love chocolate? Want a delicious recipe? Stop on over at MMU and get Camryn's chocolate truffle recipe. You'll be glad you did! {I am so making these} --xoxo

{ i'm at mmb today }

2011-02-04T14:53:00.004-07:00

Remember how I labeled the shelves in my fridge? Well, I wrote a post over at Mormon Mommy Blogs about that amazingly ghetto adventure. ;) And it posted today. Check it out:

Label Your Fridge

I'm going to lay back down now . . .

Hope you all have an amazing sick-free weekend!!

xoxo

{ i wish . . . }

2011-02-03T21:29:00.004-07:00

I wish I could tell you the reason for not blogging this week was because I was here:

image

When in reality, it's because I was here:

image

Cold and flu season finally hit our house.

Nyquil is saving my life...

{ my healthy, non-workout-or-diet resolution }

2011-01-26T20:02:00.010-07:00

Let's face it.

Healthy food is expensive, and not-so-great-for-you food is easier on the pocket book. Our family feasts upon such items as top ramen, mac 'n cheese, spaghetti, peanut butter sandwiches, rice, etc. {It's what happens when Daddy is in school} The massive thing these foods have in common? They're all carbohydrates.

Carbs are cheap. And easy and quick to make. And cheap.

No, we don't eat that much 'junk food' and yes, we drink lots of milk and we throw in yogurt, oatmeal, beans, fruits and veggies, etc. here and there, but I feel that we are missing out on the daily consumption of fresh, wholesome foods that provide one with the proper nutrients and vitamins.

And let's be honest with ourselves: hotdogs and chicken nuggets aren't loaded with proper nutrients and vitamins. ;)

So even though {at this present moment}, we have to purchase slightly-less-than-good-for-you food items to stay within our budget, I am bound and determined to have an "I'm going to change my life in a healthy way" goal on my 2011 resolution list. And since I know that I am not one of those who keep up with ANY physical fitness routine or diet for longer than 2 weeks {unless money/a prize/competition with someone else is involved}, I decided to be realistic with this type of goal.

Our family is going to take a multi-vitamin every. single. day.

Simple. Easy. Important.

It's my kind of goal. And more importantly, one I can keep up with for more than 2 weeks... ;)

Do you have a simple and easy resolution? I'd love to hear about it!

a few healthier living resources:

6 natural remedies you probably already have - SimpleMom.net

13 healthy habits to improve your life - WebMD.com

healthy living today - HealthyLiving Portal.net

original clip art image from free-retro-graphics.com

{ camryn's corner }

2011-01-25T21:11:00.005-07:00

Just thought I would send a little shout-out to Camryn over at Mean Mommy University to say "Congratulations"!

She's having another girl!

She's blogged over at MMU about her future as a mom of four girls and one boy . . .

Teenage years are going to be AWESOME. ;)

Are you a parent of multiple girls and a lonely boy? What things do you do to keep the estrogen levels in check?

Congrats again to Camryn! Here's to many Father/Son outings!

{ reality check : resolution #4}

2011-01-18T10:10:00.005-07:00

As I scroll down my google reader, I find myself feeling a tad bit guilty. It seems like some women can do it all.

Perfect Homes.
Perfect Children.
Adoring Husbands.
Gourmet Chef Abilities.
Amazing Design Capabilities.
Etc.

My life is not so glamourous.

There is always some mess somewhere in my home.
There is always some point of the day where I am scolding my children.
Okay, make that multiple points in the day.
I'm still trying to train The Mister.
We've been married almost 9 years.
It's slow going...
My main specialty is Spaghetti.
Not that I can't cook more than that, I just don't have the time since I teach until 6pm.
My home does NOT look like a magazine page from Pottery Barn.
Etc.

But you know what?

I'm learning that it's OK. It's alright if I don't have a perfect home. It's fine if I can't keep up with the Jones'. As long as I'm doing MY best.

This weekend my house was a disaster. And I should have cleaned it. But instead I took my daughter to Ross, then to Jamba Juice, and then back home to watch a movie and paint our nails while the boys were at the Supercross. Some may say that my priorities where a little messed up, but I didn't want to miss out on an opportunity to have a fun girls night out with my little girl. And that was more important to me at the time than clean toilets. {Which are clean now, just incase you were wondering.} ;)

I may not be Superwoman, but I can still love my life.

Dirty dishes and all...

I've learned that some women CAN do it all. I just happen to NOT be one of them. And that's just me being realistic. And I'm learning to be ok with it- to be ok with imperfection.

{ finding the funny everyday }

2011-01-12T08:49:00.005-07:00

This one is a tough one. Not that I don't find things hilarious, or have a cheerful attitude towards life in general, but that I find myself stressing and freaking out about things way.too.often.

Water off a ducks back.

I need to apply this cliche pronto.

But how does one find the funny when life is tough- being burdened with the stress of home, family, and trials that keep coming faster than Wile E. Coyote's homemade jet pack?

Take a Mommy Time-Out.

And find something to laugh at.

It's Therapeutic.

Finding the humor in everyday life isn't something that can happen overnight. And people aren't just born with it. Granted, there are people who are blessed with amazing senses of humor, but even they, too, have rough days. {Which are TOTALLY ok} This year, I want to be Happier. And it isn't something that I can rely on others for. It's something that has to happen from the inside.

Like every worthwhile thing in life, I will have to work at it. Teach myself. Strengthen that part of my brain to become so strong that it overpowers the stressing lobe. {I'm quite certain that all mommy's have a stressing lobe, even though it isn't proven scientifically.}

I'm going to go out and search for Funny. I will start a Humor Diary- to write down or archive everything that makes me laugh. After awhile, I won't have to search, I will just see it naturally.

So that is my goal this year: to simply Laugh. I don't want to stress over the poop smears in the bathroom anymore. I want to just be able to clean it up, and then laugh at it. Which reminds me of this:

Yes, I have this archived. Because it's funny. And so is this:

{This my friends, is Brian Regan. For those who don't know, The Man is a Comic Genius.}

And this:

image source

{The Mr. almost got this cookie cake today. Because I was mad at him. I still loved him, but only "that" much...}

And here's an old post that still makes me laugh:

{ universal truths }

Got something Funny to share? I'd love to hear about it!

{ free printable birthday tag }

2011-01-11T22:40:00.005-07:00

Today is the last time I will ever be able to celebrate my birthday.

I turned 29.

I've heard that once you hit 29, you never get any older.

So, goodbye birthdays. You've been so good to me. ;)

The Mr. did alright this year. Got me a charm bracelet. Love.

But his wrapping was a little....

It needed a tag.

So for those of you who need a birthday tag, here ya go:

Feel free to print this off and use it whenever.

Nothing glamorous, but useful nonetheless.

I will be back tomorrow to finish up my New Year's Resolutions.

I'm off to eat my free Krispy Kreme doughnut.

{For you AZ peeps, here is a list of birthday freebies you should check out!}

{ camryn's corner }

2011-01-10T10:01:00.005-07:00

Sometimes hard things happen.

But sometimes it ends up being alright.

When it comes to our children, we would do anything just to make sure they are healthy, happy and still here on earth.

Even though we have no control over the last one.

I've been blessed to have my two children with me, a blessing that I hope I get to enjoy for the rest of my life.

To those who have suffered a loss of a sweet child, my heart aches for you. I cry when I read your stories, even though I've never met you.

I can't even imagine.

Even though I have gone through a miscarriage, I still can't fathom losing the two I tuck into bed, read to, and sing a bedtime song to every night.

I think my world would stop.

Read Camryn's post on her feelings {and pregnancy scare} about those who have gone through a world stopping experience.

May you and your loved ones get to experience a long and happy life!

{ i'm just gonna do it : resolution #2 }

2011-01-07T09:05:00.006-07:00

My husband works graveyard shifts. Which means when I get up, he goes to bed. Well, kinda. There's about 4 hours in between. Four hours that I feel is completely unnecessary to have a made bed. Completely unnecessary...

Or is it?

Will I feel better? Will it help me have a better day? Even though the Mr. is sleeping there? Perhaps it will agitate me more, knowing that he's messing up all my hard work?

But I'm willing to test it out. I will ignore the studies that say to not make my bed because bed bugs cannot survive in the dry conditions that is an unmade bed. {Hopefully because I don't wet the bed, we'll be safe...} ;) All I know is that I love climbing into a perfectly made bed that smells like fabric softener.

image source

and in my dreams...

Which is another resolution I should add: washing my sheets more than once a month. Gross, I know. I just get busy and forget...

Is making the bed every morning {and washing sheets more than once a month} on your New Year's Resolutions List??

{ how Brian Regan gave me awesome parenting advice }

2011-01-06T08:49:00.011-07:00

Imagine, if you will, you are sitting at the dinner table. You have served up your specialty: spaghetti and meatballs with a four cheese blend sprinkled on top. The fruit of your loins are sitting around the table, gathered in reverent awe at the smorgasbord before their eyes. It's perfect. You even remembered the salad, to appease the food-guide-pyramid gods. Everyone bows their head, blesses the food, and then...

It hits you that you really should invest in Clorox-or-Lysol-Disinfectant-Wipes stock.

I went to a Brian Regan concert with the Mr. a few weeks ago. Laughed my rear off. My cheeks hurt, my stomach was sore; all from laughing. It was the best date night ever. I knew it would be awesome, I just didn't know it would be THAT awesome. I also didn't think I would leave with a valuable parenting lesson.

Mr. Regan began his spaghetti monologue, which I will massacre in the next few sentences just to get to the point. His son was twirling his spaghetti noodle, one end in his mouth, the other end orbiting around, like a propeller on a plane. Sauce was flying everywhere, but he was oblivious to that.

Then Brian made us laugh harder, as he told us his thoughts, his reactions, and his deep dark wish that he, too, could do that with his noodles.

As we were laughing at the truthfulness of his words, he threw in this sentence: "The paint on our walls is more important than the joy in your heart!"

It's the only line I remember word-for-word. And even though I still laugh, it got me thinking. How many times have we put our 'stuff' before our children? Unfortunately, I am guilty of this. So, unbeknownst to Mr. Regan, he gave me one of the most valuable lessons I have yet to receive as a parent.

The paint on our walls is NOT more important than the joy in their hearts.

Stuff can be replaced, children/people can not. It doesn't mean I'm going to let them run hog wild, it just means that I am going to try and see things from their perspective. Swinging noodles is fun. Filling the bathtub till it pours over the side is fun. Squishing chips into the floor is fun. So instead of yelling at them "What were you thinking?!!" {which is dumb, 'cuz I know exactly what they were thinking: THIS. IS. AWESOME.}, I'm going to try and use it as a teaching moment {after taking ten deep breaths of course}. Instead of screaming "Stop! No!" I will {try and remember to} use the simple words: "Uh-oh, that's not a good idea because..." and have them clean up their mess.

It's going to be hard. I'm POSITIVE I will fail quite a few times, but it's a goal of mine for this year. It's my new year's resolution: Patience. And breathing.

Lots and lots of breathing.

{ my christmas card to you }

2010-12-21T08:00:00.002-07:00

It's almost here:

As I write by the tree, all lit.

{It's small, but warm}

Wishing all a Beautiful Holiday,

May it be the most Amazing one yet.

. . . xoxo

{ the last minute teacher/neighbor gift - peppermint theme }

2010-12-15T09:36:00.017-07:00

Peppermint or Wintergreen? I usually pick Wintergreen, but when it's Christmas, there's nothing like good, old-fashioned, Peppermint.

Here's a few ideas for the last minute shoot-I-forgot-the-so-and-so's, brought to you by the Classic Christmas Flavor: Peppermint.

{save this image to your computer to use as a label}

Large Marshmallows

Hard Peppermint Candies

Powder Sugar

Milk

Hot Cocoa

Crush peppermint candies. Mix powder sugar and milk together until slightly runny. Dip half of the marshmallow in the 'frosting' then roll in crushed candies. Place on cookie sheet until dry.

Here's where you can get creative:

Place some hot cocoa powder in a Mason jar, then fill the remaining jar with Peppermint Mallows. {This would also be cute if you had the patience to dip mini marshmallows}

Place toothpicks inside the non-candied end of the marshmallow, then place in cellophane bags with individual packets of hot cocoa.

Or if you run out of cellophane bags halfway through, use a quart sized Ziploc, then place your Christmas card in an envelope and staple or tape it to the top to cover up the glorious blue zipper seal. You could also print and fold this over the top:

{click on picture for actual size}

And here's another recipe for all you peppermint lovers out there:

{another optional label}

1 16.5 oz package ready to bake sugar cookie dough

{or make your own}

1 cup mini marshmallows

1/3 cup white chocolate chips

1/3 cup crushed hard peppermint candies

1: Preheat oven to 350°. Line a 9x9" baking pan with tin foil and spray with non-stick cooking spray. 2: Press dough evenly into bottom of pan. 3: Bake 18-20 min. and remove from oven. Immediately sprinkle with marshmallows and chocolate chips. Bake 3-4 min. longer, or until marshmallows are puffed. Sprinkle with crushed candy and cool completely {about 1 hr} 4: To serve, lift foil with uncut bars from pan. Place on cutting board. Dip knife in hot water and cut into 9 large squares.

image source

And there you go! Just a couple simple ideas for the Holidays. Do you have a favorite peppermint recipe? I'd love to hear about it! And let me know of all the other cute ways you come up with to present these delicious treats!

--------------------------------------------------------

Here's to eating junk, but having great smelling breath!

--------------------------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

PS: Yes, I too, have gained 12.5 pounds just by reading this. 'Tis the season, right? ;)

{ it's a christmas miracle }

2010-12-09T11:50:00.010-07:00

So it's December 9th. And what have I done?

Christmas packages: shipped

Christmas cards: in the mail box

Neighbor gifts: made, 1/2 delivered

Teacher gifts: signed, sealed and delivered

Christmas Eve Dinner: pre-made and in the freezer

Christmas Decor: up

Boxes housing Christmas Decor: back. in. the. garage.

{This is seriously monumental. Simply unheard of this early in the month}

Christmas shopping: done

Christmas presents: still not all wrapped, but hey-- no one's perfect, right? ;)

Ladies and Gents. It is only the 9th. And I am just about ready for Christmas.

*dreamy sigh*

My house, however, is a disaster.

*non-dreamy sigh + head shake*

Laundry coming out my ears {no clean socks, on the last of the towels, etc.}, toilets that have been neglected much longer than is sanitarily permitted, places on my floor that act as a sticky trap for unsuspecting passerby-ers, and carpets that could act as a halfway house for small critters {complete with cracker crumbs and paper bedding}. But I am off to tackle this massive disaster zone! Feel free to send in recruits like this if you don't hear from me soon:

-------------------------------------

have a fantastically festive weekend!

-------------------------------------

I know I will--we're going to see Brian Regan on Saturday! *squeal!*

xoxo

jordan

{ camryn's corner }

2010-12-07T09:58:00.005-07:00

I've been slacking on plugging Camryn's posts over at mmu, which is totally not a good thing because she has some Exciting News!!! Read her post from last week, and then come back.

***

Okay, I told you! Awesome, huh?

Now, read her insanely hilarious post she wrote yesterday. You will laugh at the cluelessness of her hubby and children. I heart that Mr. Of The Camryn and her offspring.... *wipe tear*

And now, I'm off to finish the last of my Christmas preparations, and do something about the Christmas decorations boxes strewn all over my house.

Seriously. It looks like a North Pole Tornado hit my house... and then threw up.

It kinda takes away from the Christmas Cheer...

;o)

------------------------------

Have a Great Rest of the Week!

------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ giveaway winner! ...and simple snack recipe }

2010-11-29T09:21:00.008-07:00

Did all of you survive your Thanksgiving weekend? I barely did. ;) Actually, I was surprised with how well we were able to handle 13 people {only 2 were children} smooshed into a 1300 sq. ft. home that is dining room-less for Thanksgiving dinner, then 2 days later the baptism of my son with an open house that accommodated even MORE people.

Let's just say I am grateful for a freezer and the ability to freeze Thanksgiving dinner a week in advance. I am also grateful for snacks that take only minutes to prepare for open houses. Like this one:

ritz crackers
strawberry cream cheese
mandarine oranges

Spread cream cheese on crackers and top with an orange slice.

That's it! Super easy. {Any clever ideas on a name for this snack?} I also had a spinach dip that was super easy as well- ranch dip packet, sour cream and chopped spinach. Simple, simple, simple. Thank the stars.

But now the company is gone, and the house is quiet. My daughter is no longer constipated {dairy products and junk food will do that to you...}, and my son is back at school. Which is the perfect time to announce A WINNER!!!

The person whom Lady Luck {and random.org} favored this morning is:

Comment #7

Katrina said: I would buy my daughter trunki for Christmas. Perfect for play and travel!

Congratulations Katrina! I will sending your $40 code to you- keep an eye on your email inbox. :)

And thank you to everyone else who entered!

------------------

Have a great week!

------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ csnstores.com giveaway }

2010-11-19T08:16:00.002-07:00

*closed*

The other day I asked my daughter if she wanted to go to school like her daddy and brother. She promptly told me no. Why? Because she didn't have a backpack.

Pretty good logic for a four year old, if you ask me. ;)

I decided to start looking for children's backpacks at an online store I have begun to love over the past few months, even though she doesn't start pre-school until next year. How stinkin' adorable is this?

Or this robot? I know it's not particularly for girls, but I would buy it anyway, just to hang in our closet. Everyday I open up that door I would smile.

Maybe for Christmas....

Speaking of Christmas, it's like 5 weeks away. Anyone else freaking out about this? Or are you one of those super organized people who have all of their gifts bought and wrapped, food in the freezer, and parties all planned out before Thanksgiving hits? {Someday I will be one of those people... just not this year. *sigh*}

My Gift To You:

I want to help a lucky reader ease the financial strain purchasing gifts can be on one's pocket book this year. What would you do if you had $40 to spend on anything you choose from over 200 online stores?? CSN stores.com has graciously offered a one-time use gift certificate to one of MMA's readers: that could be YOU.

Keeping it short and simple:

I'm experimenting with a less is more approach to this giveaway.

| Just leave a comment. One simple comment. |

You can tell me about what you would choose if you won, what colors your Christmas tree will be this year, how many guests you are hosting for Thanksgiving, the name of your pet goldfish, or whatever your heart desires. As long as it's clean... ;) I would love for you to spread the word for extra entries, but there seems to be a lot on people's plates during the Holidays, and I don't want to add one more thing to your overflowing agendas. {And some people don't have blogs, or a facebook/twitter account, so I thought I would even out the playing field.}

You have until Sunday, November 28th {at midnight} to enter. I will be picking a winner via Random.org and announcing the lucky person on Monday, November 29th.

------------------------

Best of luck to you all!

------------------------

xoxo

jordan

Fine Print: please be aware that this is a one-time use online code. There may be shipping charges, or if you're in Canada, international fees for certain products.

{ comfort zone . . . again }

2010-11-05T20:21:00.005-07:00

As The Holiday Season sneaks upon us, I find that my free time is becoming extinct. So I decided that this week I would revisit an old post. Hope it brings a smile to your day!

***

{ comfort zone }

original post on 4.8.10 found here

Imagine, if you will, a small classroom inside a church building. Right across from that classroom are these two signs:

My daughter, who is 3, needed to use the restroom during a lesson one Sunday, in the room across from the a fore-mentioned signs. Her teacher, who is a good friend of mine, was teaching a class of approx. 5 children all under the age of 4.

One cannot simply abandon 4 other small children for the immediate needs of one.

My friend, decided that she would get the other kids occupied and then take my daughter to the restroom.

She was unable to put this plan into effect.

She turned around only to find my daughter had already exited the room.

Sweet.

I cannot imagine the immediate panic that would strike a teacher, as the thought of a three year old escapee was running around the church building doing who knows what who knows where, with the cry of freedom racing through their wee little noggin.

She checked the ladies room.

Nope.

There was another room. A room that no woman has seen, where signs like no girls allowed are hung on the front door, and girls stink, or girls have cooties are etched into bathroom stalls.

Okay, I'm making that up. I don't really know if that's true - I've never seen the inside of a male sanctuary before.

As fate would have it, my friend's husband happened to walk by.

"Go see if Em is in there."

"In where?"

"THERE."

"Ohhh..."

So her husband enters the place were estrogen is banned, and words like "Where's your underwear?", and "Is this your underwear?" {which I might note, I don't think that princess underwear would belong to any one else in there who was currently using the facilities}, and "Put them on", and "Put your dress down", and "No, put your dress down," could be heard in the hallway.

As he guided her out the door and into the correct restroom, my friend noticed he was stifling laughter. Upon asking why he was laughing, he said "She was straddling the urinal like a mini toilet."

I don't know how she managed to get up there, but apparently she thought the 'toilet' was just her size.

At least she didn't try eating the 'mints' that usually accompany urinals.

Not that I would know what they are . . .

***

And you know what, the pull-my-hair-out moments haven't ended there.

*sigh*

Good thing I love her...

---------------------------------------------

hope everyone has a {mostly} perfect weekend!

---------------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

*original images found via google.

{ some people don't need to dress up }

2010-10-29T12:02:00.007-07:00

Happy {almost} Hallowe'en Everyone! {Yes, I saw someone write Halloween with an apostrophe, and thought I should be all cool and punctuational-like as well. It kinda makes me feel smarter.}

I can't believe the end of October is already upon us, and the Night Of Tricks Or Treats is Tomorrow! {For us, at least.} My kids are excited about their costumes, and I am debating whether or not I should dress up for the neighborhood Trunk-or-Treat. Hmmm......

Wouldn't it be nice to be a Celebrity Look-a-like? Then you wouldn't even have to dress up. All you would need is a 'Hi. My name is...' sticker.

Bam!

Instant costume.

Here are a bunch of people who have Halloween costume ideas In The Bag:

{Warning: TONS of pictures ahead...}

And of course, Patrick Stewart can go to the next Halloween Party as his 20-year-younger self and totally get away with it.

Check out even more Look-A-Likes at Totally Looks Like.com!

So:

Stumped about your costume this year?

Do you look like a celebrity?

Well there's your costume idea.

You're Welcome.

;)

--------------------------------------------

Hope everyone has a super safe and fun Halloween!

--------------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ simplifying }

2010-10-21T18:40:00.007-07:00

"Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity! I say let your affairs be as two or three, and not a half hundred or a thousand."

| Henry David Thoreau |

I'm not really that old. At least that's what I'm telling myself. My brain seems to think otherwise.

Each year, I find it harder and harder to remember things. Perhaps it's the surplus of responsibilities that seem to pile upon me as my Little Family grows up. Perhaps it's the lack of daily intellectual conversations {talking to myself doesn't count either- just makes me look even more crazy and brainless}.

Whatever the reason(s) may be, the fact still remains: I have the memory of an Atlantic Cod.

Which is why it was no surprise that I missed the Birthday Party bandwagon for my son this year. I kept telling myself I had plenty of time to plan one. Plenty of time.

His birthday is Today. My Little Boy is turned eight. And I almost failed miserably as an awesome mother.

But who says he has to know that?

I was reading an article at the beginning of the week {as I was frantically trying to decide what to do in regards to keeping my son from becoming aware of how Super Lame his mom was}, and it struck a chord. A chord of the purest and most inspired nature that the choirs of angels held a moment of silence as they listened to the immaculacy of the moment.

In the Wallet Pop article, 9 Ways We Waste Money, Vicky Passmore writes about the biggest money wasters of 2010. As I read through it, I was nodding my head in agreement but stopped abruptly at number 8. Children's Birthday Parties.

"We too mourn the loss of the home birthday party-the one with a homemade cake, some backyard games and no flashy goodie bags. Flash forward to the present, when a two-hour party for 10 kids at the local "bounce house" will cost you $200 (before cake and parting-gifts), and you know it's time to put on the brakes. We say: Go old school. This is especially true with the under-8-set, who enjoy pretty much anything that involves sugar and running around with their pals."

That last sentence opened my eyes to a beautifully immaculate plan. I don't need to spend any money. Which by the way, my wallet greatly approves of. I sent out an email to some of the moms in the area and told them about a Birthday Playdate {not party} at the park on Friday {yesterday}. No presents allowed, no decorations {I did decorate the house with streamers and balloons- I'm not THAT cheap *wink*}, just a birthday cake from Basha's {free with coupon!}, some lemon water and a huge playground to run around on.

And you know what?

It was a HUGE success! I didn't need to rent a clown, or an inflatable bounce house thingy, or buy a bunch of themed decor and goodies, not that I don't LOVE or adore a good themed party, but we forget that children are simple. They are amused by simple things, they beam from head to toe with a simple praise, they overcome fears with a simple bedtime story and song, and they give out simple, flawless, perfect love.

Love that doesn't require a Chuck-E-Cheese-esque birthday party to be given.

-----------------------------------------------

Here's to keeping our lives simple and weeding out the unnecessary 'Stuff'

-----------------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

Ps- This post was about just a friend celebration on the day before his birthday. My son did open presents from family today, had a massive birthday breakfast, and we are headed to the drive-in tonight as a family- pizza and ice-cream included. Just incase some where concerned... ;)

{ a monday mention }

2010-10-18T10:22:00.006-07:00

I love reading blogs. Especially funny ones. Ones that make me forget that I have 947 loads of laundry, a sink full of dishes, and a 4 year old screaming at me because I didn't carry her up the stairs.

{God gave her beautiful legs. It would be a shame to not use them. He also gave her a voice, which she should have used before I was already at the top. And she should've used said voice to ask nicely and not demand.}

I also have this problem called commentophobia. I love reading, but since I have 947 loads of laundry, a sink full of dishes and a 4 year old to put in time-out for screaming, I fear that if I spend 2 more seconds to make a comment {although for me it takes more like 5 minutes because I got the 'economic' package, which we all know is code for slower than frozen molasses internet}, I will go to bed crying because I wasn't a very good mom that day and I neglected my motherly responsibilities and children by wasting time on the computer, blah, blah, blah.... you know. The Guilt Trip. All us mommies do it. ; ) So I just read. Quickly. As not to upset the Guilt Trip Gods.

Here's a blog I frequent, but shamefully do not leave nearly enough comments at. {Which is why I love that there are little buttons I can press to rate posts! A little, 'Hi I was here!' note that doesn't take nine years to accomplish, thanks to the fact that I am a tightwad and don't want to upgrade my internet package.} I am proud to present:

If you have not checked out Cheeseboy's blog, please do so. I always get a good laugh. {fyi-make sure you spell 'good' with two o's. Otherwise, you will be informing people that you laugh like Zeus.}

Here's a snippet of what you will find over there:

*awesomeness*

It totally makes me want to graph something.... hmmm.....

Go. Check it out. Thank me later.

: )

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have a great week!

------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ where have all the children gone }

2010-10-15T12:51:00.012-07:00

After last weekend, I decided to start documenting what I would find in my kid's bedrooms every morning.

Here's a visual archive of what I found:

Where are my children, you ask?

{warning:terrible middle of the night camera phone picture ahead}

That's right. On my Bedroom Floor.

Why do they even HAVE beds?

And yes, my daughter wakes up in the middle of the night and gets dressed and then goes back to sleep. I'm hoping it's a phase...

And yes, I did turn the light on at 4am to take a picture- what kind of ~~monster~~ mother am I?

And yes, I sleep with my cell phone by me . . .

Doesn't everyone?

;)

Hope you all had an awesome Fall Break . . .

I kinda don't want it to end. *gazing off reminiscingly*

----------------------------------------------

hope you all have an awesome non-100° weekend!

----------------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ camryn's corner }

2010-10-11T10:35:00.005-07:00

I think Camryn lives in the land of Crazy, in the city of Chaos, on Dysfunction Jct. ;o)

The things that poor girl is dealing with lately makes me want to curl up in a ball and cry for her.

But even though things are a little hectic at 257 Dysfunction Jct, she is starting a new business, a service if you will, for the rest of us mothers.

Ask yourself:

Do my children not love each other enough? Do they fight constantly? Is there some serious lack of appreciation and respect within the confines of my home?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then Camryn's Family Services is for you!

One satisfied customer wrote, "She actually hugged her brothers when she got home!!! That never happens!"

That's proof right there people. This girl has skills.

And so do her children.

Read about the adventure of Camryn's niece when she naively asked to spend some 'quality time' with the relatives. She thought she was getting away from her family, but in the end, developed a very deep appreciation for them instead.

That's the kind of service you'll get people. It's magical . . .

Head on over to mmu and sign up for this amazing service! Rabies shots not required! Blown eardrums for the first 5 people! And as an added bonus, a caveman club keychain as a gift for you to keep, even if you decide that Camryn's Family Services may not be right for you.

Happy Reading! ;o)

-----------------------

have a fabulous monday!

-----------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ a pbs kids life }

2010-10-07T19:41:00.011-07:00

Do you ever get an unusual feeling of frustration when you find out you are going to see the same people again tomorrow, because you think "Bummer. Now I can't wear the same outfit two days in a row"? Or is it just me?

When someone still owns clothes from high school, it becomes a little difficult to find an ensemble that is cute and trendy. So when I magically find a combination that does work, I want to wear it every. single. day.

Have you ever noticed that all the cartoon characters wear the same thing every day? How much easier would life be if we all could do the same? To have a signature look that is all our own? We could come up with some glorious apparel concoction and buy in bulk. We would never, ever have to worry about what to wear ever again. {Of course I would need to buy different sizes, to make sure I would have an outfit to wear EVERY day of the month. You know, to compensate for any bloating or over eating that may occur. *wink, wink*}

Unfortunately, it would get VERY boring VERY fast. *sad face*

Yet I dream in my most deepest of dreamy dreams of having one less thing to worry about. {Anyone else considered owning a wig? Or five?}

Sometimes I wish my life was like a Public Broadcasting Station cartoon. A life that has:

a moral of the day,

a four year old that can grasp mature grown-up concepts and words,

a monkey that can do my grocery shopping,

a cat in a striped hat that can entertain my kids until dinner,

a train that can go back in time,

a choreographed song that my friends and I sing and dance to every time we meet,

get answers to the questions that bog my mind down in the morning that very day in school {or in a magical book}

have the power to change my story with a magic writer,

or simply combine the words k-e-y and build the word 'key' when I have lost mine.

And who wouldn't LOVE to live on Sesame Street? {For some odd reason the theme song to "Cheers" is now running through my brain. "...where everybody knows your name..."}

So thanks to pbs kids, I am now acutely aware of the lack of the above mentioned coveted necessities in my life.

BUT,

I have also come to learn something magical from watching them all these years:

I can indeed pick my own letter and number of the day.

And I already have a monkey who helps with my grocery shopping.

;)

What would you wish for if you could have a pbs kids life?

-------------------------------------------------------------

Today's post was brought to you by the letter L and the number 14

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xoxo

jordan

all images from pbskids.org

{ csn stores . com review }

2010-09-30T09:26:00.002-07:00

Alright ladies and gents. Here is my very first review. Ever. I'm a little giddy about it, mainly because it was such a positive experience for me. :) {Thank the stars! I would have hated to write a negative review!}

I did a giveaway from csnstores.com a little while ago, and I was completely impressed with the way they handled things. Very respectful and informative. So when I was asked if I would like to do a review, I jumped on that bandwagon faster than you could say "I need another cake stand!".

And that's what I chose.

This beauty:

*sigh*

No, that is not your imagination. Angels really are singing...

You can find this platter of pedestaled perfection here.

the product.

My cake stand arrived via UPS, and was packed well- a styrofoam mold. Which I was grateful for. I hate it when there are a googolplex packing peanuts, which to children, mean Happiest Day Ever. To me, it means Messiest Day Ever. Not a fan of cleaning up a mass of static cling snow.

This cakestand is solid. And as I was inspecting (and wiping drool from the corners of my mouth), I noticed something on the bottom that made my heart skip a beat:

Dishwasher AND Microwave safe.

I know it seems a little ridiculous that I would get excited over such simple words, but let me tell you- if I see something that says NOT dishwasher or microwave safe, it boils my blood. This is 2010 people!! It's not like dishwashers and microwaves are for the richest of the rich, or only available to those in certain upstanding and wealthy circles, or on the black market- they are pretty much standard in a home. And have been for quite.some.time.

{coming back from tangent}

Not that it wouldn't be so easy just to wipe this cake stand down with a rag, and I have no idea why I would need to place it in a microwave, but just the knowledge that I CAN makes sunshine and rainbows in my heart.

And since this is a review, I DID put it in the dishwasher.

I think it sparkles.

{Oh, the magic...}

My daughter turned 4 last weekend, so it was a perfect time to use this snow white beauty. I frosted the cake on it, wiped off the excess frosting from the plate with ease, and even sawed down on it with my knife when cutting the cake.

NO scratches.

This thing is GOLDEN. You should get one.

the company.

CsnStores.com has a million bajillion products to choose from. It took me over a week to decide what to review. The selection is amazing. If you haven't browsed yet, take at LEAST 5 hours out of your day and go to online shopper heaven.

Checkout is easy, and they have an amazing feature where you can let them know if you saw that certain product for less, somewhere else. After reviewing your submission, they will then email you back with a code that will let you purchase said product for cheaper. Like that day.

Awesome.

I must say that I am a huge fan now, and I look forward to working with them again in the future!

------------------------------------------------

Hope you all have amazing plans for the weekend!

------------------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ps, the giveaway that was supposed to go along with this post didn't work out like I had hoped, but I do have another one coming up soon!}

{ the pantry purge }

2010-09-15T17:25:00.015-07:00

Here's another post to add to my mini-series:

So I have this small little closet in my kitchen. It isn't a proper pantry, but we'll call it that anyway. It was stuffed to the max with the normal things one finds in a pantry: cereal bags, canned foods, boxes of Mac & Cheese {of the Kraft persuasion}, bags of baking necessities {i.e. flour, sugar, etc.}, oil, syrup, oatmeal, rice, peanut butter, cake mixes, popcorn, paper goods, etc.

You know, the usual.

I always dreaded opening that small door. The inside never seemed to please me. I never did delight in the 'hunt' that I was about to embark on.

Here was my problem: I had a square closet with lots of round stuff.

I needed all that stuff to be square. I heard somewhere that it is 'hip' to be so... ;)

Here's my other problem: I didn't want to spend the bazillion dollars those square canisters and organizers cost.

Enter Wally World.

Have you seen these? They are about $3.00 at Walmart. They hold approx. 16 cups, and Don't have handles {those one's cost more- even the smaller ones}.

I have bought 10 over the past year. And they have made me happy. But being the label ~~obsessed~~ conscious-minded person that I am, I took these plastic gems a step further.

Enter Stampin' Up paraphernalia:

I used a large stamp set and the permanent ink pad and stamped labels on the sides of my containers.

After purging the unnecessary crap and some 8 year old food items {do pinto beans even last that long in bag form?}, I dumped my bagged items in the containers and created a much more flowing {and surprisingly empty} pantry. I'm sure I will change it over the next couple years, but for now, it is sooo much better and easier to find things. Here are the shelves individually:

And the whole thing:

I must admit that I have a 'food storage' place under my stairs that houses all the extra cans, 50 million boxes of Mac & Cheese, massive bags of rice, extra toothpaste/cleaner/deodorant items, etc. so I have the luxury of only housing items I use on a mostly regular basis in my kitchen. {But I won't show you the food storage area yet, because it, too, needs a major make-over}

I feel a little less frazzled when it comes to making breakfast/lunch/dinner now. I can see exactly what I have, and know exactly when I need to stock up {like on flour} so I'm not in the middle of making something and have to drop everything, or have Mr. Smith run to the store so I can finish making cookies for the children in my church.

Not that that has ever happened before...

Someday my pantry will be eye candy and functional with beautiful matchy baskets, and rows of lovely glass jars, and be larger than a doll closet:

*swoon*

But for now, this works. It's not really pretty, but it's a great place to start 'the process of evolving into that Perfect Pantry' from.

So for today,

-------------------------------

Operation Sanity was a success!

-------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

ps- do you have an awesome room, closet, or organizing system that works wonders for you? I would love to hear about it! Email me the details at jordanriverblossom@yahoo.com and I'll share your inspiration with The World. Or at least with those who read this blog. ;)

Images here, here and here.

{ camryn's corner }

2010-09-14T08:29:00.005-07:00

You know that age your children reach when you cannot DO or SAY anything because they will repeat it?

I'm still laughing. At Cam's daughter's comment. Hilarious. Check out what she said at mmu.

It's times like this that I am grateful my 7 year old is in Speech Therapy...

{Hey, glass half full, right?}

And guess what is coming today!!

A certain package from here.

I keep checking the UPS web site, like it will magically show me a map with a blinking dot following the truck that holds my precious cargo...

...but it doesn't.

-------------------------------

Hope you all have a great week!

-------------------------------

'cuz Halloween time is almost here.

*squeal*

xoxo

jordan

{ lost and still not found }

2010-09-02T19:53:00.003-07:00

--------------------------------------------

hope you all have a great Labor Day weekend!

--------------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ monday thoughts }

2010-08-30T09:30:00.007-07:00

I live in a small townhome. I love it, though. It's making me de-junk. It's making me prioritize my worldly possessions. It's making me 'simplify' my life. But it is also making my brain go crazy trying to come up with solutions to make sure there is no 'wasted space'. Most of my items need to do double duty. Or they're out of here.

Which gets the wheels turning. And thinking about beautiful, yet practical and useful items.

Take this coffee table:

Gorgeous and provides a luxurious storage area.

{found here}

*sigh*

{Did I mention that the builder of our humble abode didn't believe in linen closets? Or storage areas in the bathroom? Did I mention that I store my towels in my coffee table? >:( }

Let me tell ya what though. By the time we move into a bigger place, I ~~might be~~ will be a pro at coming up with storage solutions.

And I will cry when I can actually put towels and sheets in a linen closet.

Actually. Cry. Tears.

It will be a beautiful day. ;o)

- - - - - -

So I have been asked to do a review of a product from here. I am giddy. And feel like a 3 year old in a candy shop.

And you should be giddy too. Because on the day I post this review, I will have a giveaway with it as well. Boo-yah!

-----------------------

Have an amazing monday!

-----------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ needing sanity }

2010-08-26T20:35:00.001-07:00

I need to be more organized.

Organization=Sanity.

In my mind, at least.

I'm scouring the internet for ideas.

If you have one, please let me know.

For ideas that I do find, I will share them with you.

And I will call my little mini-series:

Without the aid of Google, I do have a little secret that I want to share. It has calmed the chaos of what used to be known as:

Let me share something I have found to be super helpful, and no, you may not laugh. Like my family did. At me.

Let me set the scene for you:

It's Saturday. You have just spent a billion dollars on groceries at you local Grocery Mart {I made that store name up}, to feed your children who seem to eat as much as 300 pound football players. After wrestling with the crowds and the kids, you plop down on the couch the minute you walk in that door.

And then remember you must unload the vehicle transporting the vast amount of food that could feed a small army.

{valuable newlywed information alert}

But this is why we have kids:

You recruit hubby and kids to unload and put groceries away.

5 hours later, when you go to make dinner, you have NO CLUE where anything is.

As you dig past the milk, orange juice, grapes, eggs, jam, sausage, shredded cheese, hot dogs and yogurt, you begin the interrogation of family members to find out where the heck the sour cream ended up at.

And you then realized you have pulled out the entire contents of the fridge for one measly little bucket that was hidden under the bag of carrots.

My solution:

Designate every shelf in the fridge for a specific group of items.

And then LABEL them.

Oh, yes. I said label.

I cannot even begin to tell you how much more organized my fridge stays. One less chaotic thing in my life is such a relief, I tell you what! How many times have you stored Leftovers, only to discover them 6 weeks later {when you're pulling everything out to find the sour cream}? Well if you have a clearly labeled Leftovers Shelf{s}, you know what you have before it goes bad. And you know exactly how long those beans in the Tupperware have been in the fridge, and are able to toss them before they ferment.

It also has helped me keep my fridge wiped down, because there is less junk in there. Before I go shopping, I go through and toss what I need to and wipe down the shelves.

Easy.

Here's what it looks like right this minute. I did not clean it prior to pulling out the camera. {And yes I am *painfully* aware that we are out of milk and that we need to go grocery shopping. This is what happens when it's almost the weekend.}

I printed out the words on regular paper, the taped them to the underside of the shelves or bins.

A free solution for an annoying problem...

Mr. Smith now knows where I want everything to go. I have learned the hard way that he doesn't read minds... :(

----------

stay sane!

----------

xoxo

jordan

{ camryn's corner }

2010-08-23T19:58:00.004-07:00

When you think of public restrooms, I bet a restaurant or gas station comes to mind, right?

I'll bet the 'Public Restrooms' Camryn found on her little weekend family trip would NOT come to your mind.

{giggle}

I won't even post pics. It would ruin the surprise.

{found here}

But they are restrooms.

And they are pretty 'public'.

Hence:

Public. Restrooms.

I love them. I think I'll call the city of Mesa and recommend these new 'facilities'.

;o)

--------------------------------------

Hope you all have an outstanding week!

--------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ a little thought }

2010-08-15T09:54:00.007-07:00

The other night my daughter, Em, woke up at 2am and crawled onto the couch by our bed. She then proceeded to cry because she wanted her stuffed horse.

Having just fallen asleep at 1am due to not feeling good, I barked and told her if she wanted it, she should grab it herself. Otherwise, she needed to go.to.sleep.

As tears flowed down her cheek, she started down the dark stairs, quietly sobbing "I'm so scared".

Gosh near broke my heart.

I followed her and turned on the light, waiting at the top of the stairs for her to return with her favorite bedtime buddy. As I was waiting for her, I thought to myself, if a friend of mine was staying the night, and asked me to grab her something during the hours of the dead, I think I would have. And I would have done it cheerfully.

And then my heart gosh near broke, again.

Why would I be nice to someone who I don't see everyday, yet get mad and frustrated with the ones in my life that I love the ABSOLUTE MOST.

You bet I snuggled her close that night.

And then, by amazing, sheer coincidence, my mom sent me this story the next day:

- - - - - - -

FAMILY

- - - - - - -

I ran into a stranger as he passed by,

'Oh excuse me please' was my reply.

He said, 'Please excuse me too;

I wasn't watching for you.'

We were very polite, this stranger and I.

We went on our way and we said goodbye.

But at home a different story is told,

How we treat our loved ones, young and old.

Later that day, cooking an evening meal,

My son stood beside me very still.

When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.

'Move out of the way,' I said with a frown.

He walked away, his little heart broken.

I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.

While I lay awake in bed,

God's still small voice came to me and said,

'While dealing with a stranger, common courtesy you use,

But the family you love, you seem to abuse.

Go look on the kitchen floor,

You'll find some flowers there by the door...

Those are the flowers he brought for you.

He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.

He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,

You never saw the tears that filled his little eyes.'

By this time, I felt very small,

And now my tears began to fall.

I quietly went and knelt by his bed;

'Wake up, little one, wake up,' I said.

'Are these the flowers you picked for me?'

He smiled, 'I found 'em, out by the tree.

I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.

I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue.'

I said, 'Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;

I shouldn't have yelled at you that way.'

He said, 'Oh, Mom, that's okay.

I love you anyway.'

I said, 'Son I love you too,

And I do like the flowers, especially the blue.'

|author unknown|

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Let's make a goal to hug more, and get frustrated less. . .

xoxo

jordan

*image here*

{ fairies }

2010-08-12T10:06:00.010-07:00

If one was to ask you to name a fairy, any fairy, I bet the Tooth Fairy would come to mind.

Or perhaps the Cleaning Fairy.

Or that ever-elusive Fairy Godmother.

But why?

Why are these 'fairies' the only ones that exist?

Why are these 'fairies' the only ones we talk about?

Why did the person who invented these 'fairies' stop there?

I believe there are plenty of more 'useful' fairies that could've been conjured into existence. If someone can come up with taking a gross tooth from your mouth and placing it under your pillow to receive money, or build up the hopes of every teenage girl that perhaps she can make it to the ball in a beautiful gown and marry a prince, then I think we can channel those creative juices to something that would be way more helpful in our daily lives.

Perhaps:

| The Cadburry Mini Egg Fairy |

Simply write down all the negative things that happened that day, place it under your pillow, and then, when you wake up, the Cadburry Mini Egg Fairy will have left you a miniature bag {or big bag, depending on how bad the day actually was} where the list used to be.

| The Cinnamon Bear Fairy |

Every time you are about to yell, or say a naughty word, the Cinnamon Bear Fairy simply whooshes in and places a Cinnamon Bear directly into your open, ready to scream, mouth.

This would be extremely helpful in my a mommy's life.

| The Poop Fairy |

No, this fairy does not leave you poop, but instead, takes away the poop. Oh yes. Every time poop enters the sacred walls of your home, the Poop Fairy will use her magic eraser and turn all poop, wherever it may be, into Thin Air.

Pure. Clean. Thin. Air.

I could've used the Poop Fairy yesterday when I almost stepped in a small pellet by the toilet.

Hence the reason for this post.

{confession alert}

I needed the Poop Fairy AND the Cinnamon Bear Fairy last night...

*ahem*

There are several other fairies that would TOTALLY be of WAY more use than the Tooth Fairy...

* the bills fairy

*the missing sock fairy

*the diet vanilla coke fairy

*the kid-calming fairy

*the chef fairy

*the PMS fairy

*the tantrum fairy

*the empty toilet roll fairy

*the fitted-sheet-folding fairy

*the spelling/thesaurus fairy

*the money fairy, and

*the blogging fairy

{I receive a surprise every time I blog}

*squeals*

What are some other fairies you could use in your life?

xoxo

jordan

------------------------------------------------

ps- make sure you use a legitimate Fairy Creating company when coming up with fairies. Especially if they are to be used for your offspring. I wrote a post a while ago on the blessings and dangers of making up fairies with the intent of subduing a child with a dilemma. Please make a note of the disclaimer at the end. That disclaimer was added because of Camryn's experience. And I would also like to mention that the Poop Fairy is not the same as the Potty fairy... FYI.

------------------------------------------------

{ camryn's corner + giveaway winner! }

2010-08-02T09:28:00.010-07:00

Puppy Stew.

If you have ever had the ~~nightmare~~ joy of raising a puppy, then I'm sure you have contemplated making

Puppy Stew.

For directions on how to make Puppy Stew in handy visual format, head on over to mmu and read Camryn's recipe.

And ignore the cute face.

Camryn's puppy is 100% guilty of all charges against her.

***

AND NOW:

As promised...

The winner of the $40 CSNstores.com Giveaway!

{insert really cool and technically challenging drumroll here}

Thanks to Random.org, the winner is:

Comment #8:

"I need a cake plate. Like NEED. Not want. This would be a lovely gift to me;)"

Congratulations iamwoman!! You are the lucky winner!

Email me at jordanriverblossom@yahoo.com {or click on the envelope icon on the top right sidebar} and let me know what email address you want your gift card sent to!

ps- if you decide that you don't want that cake plate after all, just let me know. I'll send you my mailing address... ; )

For everyone else that entered: Thank you! I feel you all should have won, so I have a little pampering packet for the rest of you!

To those who entered and are interested {no pressure- only if you want it}, email me

{ jordanriverblossom@yahoo.com - or again, envelope on the right} your mailing address, and I'll send one of these glorious packets, 'cuz you deserve it! It includes a hydrating face wash, balancing toner, day and night serum, corrective eye cream, and a face cream- one for day and one for night. This stuff is great for all skin types, and is so potent that a teeny drop goes a long way. And I love the smell... citrus-y. Mmmm.... Pardon me while I go wash my face...

-------------------------------

Hope you all have a great week!

-------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

{puppy image found here}

{ a little reminder }

2010-07-28T12:24:00.003-07:00

GIVEAWAY

Just thought I'd drop a subtle reminder....

Hey, who wouldn't want an extra $40 worth of free stuff?

xoxo

jordan

{ clarifying 'the dancer' }

2010-07-27T08:45:00.003-07:00

{warning: serious content ahead}

Remember this post about our brief stay at Vegas?

I just received a comment about it that pulled at my gut a little bit. The commenter wrote:

Bwahaha!!! You took your family to the Vegas Strip and then blame the HOTEL for exposing your kids to scum??!?wow, that's funny. Funny in a very sad sort of way.

Now I don't know if she was just teasing a little, or being completely serious, {where's that darn sarcasm font when you need it} but it kinda broke my heart. It confirmed the guilt I already felt for taking the loves of my life there, but it also made me realize that I must be a horrible writer, because the point of the story was not that visible.

{No, this is not a "I need sympathy" post whatsoever. Just the real, raw me clarifying.}

But I actually thanked this commenter for her feedback. 'Cuz who knows how many people out there were/are thinking the exact same thing.

And for that I apologize.

I keep thinking that everyone 'knows' me. I keep thinking that everyone would automatically know that I would never take my kids anywhere without doing research first. I keep thinking that everyone knows that I am the most trusting person, and will take the advice of friends and family who have 'been there and done that'.

So to those of you who don't know me personally, here's the background of our Vegas story.

I asked around. I did. I got the advice of people I knew who had taken their families to Vegas. Granted they hadn't been there in awhile, but I got the tips and tricks. We should stay at either this or this hotel, do this and that, not this or that- you know, that kind of advice. When we came back and told those people, they were mortified. They felt horrible, because they had given us bad info.

So it is to you, dear readers who have either had a safe experience, or have heard of someone that had and were contemplating a short hotel stay one night, that I wrote that post for. Vegas has changed. We paid to learn that, and I wanted to pass on that nugget of information, so no one else makes the same mistake, or gives advice to others about their safe time.

It is not cheap anymore. They do not cater to families anymore. No matter what anyone tells you. I shouldn't have cared that my husband hadn't slept for 25 hours and needed to stop at a hotel {he doesn't like to sleep when I drive- weird}. Next time we will drive right on past and hit the next available town.

That's big.

Because Mr. Smith got robbed at gunpoint once in a small town on the outskirts of Vegas a couple years ago while filling up at a gas station.

Which is why we thought a hotel on the actual strip with lots of people would be a little safer.

'Cuz I would rather teach my little girl that pole dancing is bad, than to visit her grave...

So go hug those kids tight, and don't ever take them near Vegas.

xoxo

jordan

ps- I also found out this morning that my friend's brother past away last weekend {talk about a tearful morning}. An account has been set up at the Bank of American Fork on the behalf of Aaron Garrett. He leaves behind a 4 year old son, and all donations {that can be made at any branch} will go towards funeral costs and the financial support of his son. To any of you who are able to help, thank you.

{ camryn's corner }

2010-07-26T13:28:00.004-07:00

I would like to thank Camryn for introducing me to this Comic Genius.

I will forever be grateful.

Here is one video, check out her post here to see others.

Comic.

Genius.

If you have the time, watch Tim Hawkins Full Range of Motion on YouTube.

You. Will. Laugh.

There are several parts, so I recommend starting with part one.

That's how it works.

; )

-----------------------------------------

Hope you all are having a great Monday!!

-----------------------------------------

xoxo

jordan

{ the dancer }

2010-07-22T21:13:00.004-07:00

Remember when Las Vegas' advertising strategy was to make it 'Fun for the whole Family'?

News Flash.

So not the case anymore.

Vegas is Dirty.

And expensive.

At least it was when we visited the Excalibur Hotel for 10 hours too long...

We were on our way to Utah, and Mr. Smith decided it would be super awesome fun to stay the night in Vegas. So we pulled up to the hotel, and walked into the nearest entrance, only to find that the check in desk was smack dab in the middle of this massive hotel. So we walk past the shiny 'games', bright lights, smoking bystanders, bars and restaurants to get to said check in desk.

And there I saw it.

Right in the middle of the 'Lobby' was a lady.

On a Stage.

Near a Pole.

Wearing Something one would find on page 34 of a Victoria Secrets magazine.

In the middle of the 'Lobby'.

Right there.

In plain sight.

With. a. Pole.

I used my body and luggage as a barrier for my son, and saw my hubby {who had Em on his shoulders} trying to turn his body away and start to do a little jog past the bystanders {a couple of under-fourteen-boys included}.

I have never been so infuriated.

{Until we checked into the room. Nasty business people, I will not tell you the HORRIBLE condition this room was in, and the perm-gone-bad smell that saturated the air, or the number of broken/chipped items, or the number of lights that didn't work, or the long black hair that I found, or the greasy film that covered all door knobs and light switches. No I will not tell you about that.}

The point of my story is what happened while standing in the check out line the next morning.

My daughter came up to me with the most delighted look on her face:

"Mommy! Go watch the dancer?! How 'bout that?!"

Crap. Despite my hubby's best efforts, she had seen Panty Pole Girl the night before.

{Oh, I think it's hilarious now, just not at that moment}

Shame on you Excalibur. Shame on you for exposing my little girl who LOVES dancing to that kind of crap. Now I have to teach a three year old that some dancing is NOT okay. Like she's gonna understand.

Guess there will be no more dancing around the house, nearly naked, allowed under this roof...

{Mr. Smith will be so disappointed...}

LOL! I soooooo kid....

PLEASE don't forget about the giveaway that ends next week! Yes! You still have time to enter! Don't be like me and think "I never win so I'm not going to bother entering", just try and see!

And now I must go and find a top to go with my daughter's tutu...

------------------------

Have an Awesome Weekend!

------------------------

xoxo

jordan

ps - my deepest apologies if any of this doesn't make sense, just know that prescription strength pain relievers are pumping through my body at the moment.

Things get kinda crazy when that happens...

***Post Note:***

Before judging me for taking my kids to Sin City, please read my clarification on this post here.

We were told that Vegas was cheap and totally fine if we did certain things and avoided others.

This post was to serve as a warning for those who have heard the same thing and wanted to try it out. My advice? Don't.

{ camryn's corner }

2010-07-19T11:38:00.007-07:00

Wanna little Monday Laugh?

Head on over to mmu and read Cam's story about a psychiatrist and a proctologist.

What would you name your clinic?

I can't decide between "Nuts and Buts" or "Loons and Moons"....

Read the rest of the clever names by going here.

And don't forget about this little giveaway:

You still have a chance to enter!

And I know it's been a long time, but I finally changed my blog button to match my new layout!

Grab one if you want!

------------------

Have a Great Week!

------------------

xoxo

jordan

Mean Mommy Academy

{ keep hanging on }

{ christmas is coming and i am getting fat }

{ updates }

{ why i love my doctor's scale }

{ my little love affair }

{ i've had better mornings }

{ how to write the perfect 80's song }

{ jam-filled butter cookies }

{ 7 . 04 . 2011 }

{ new winner }

{ my memories winner }

{ why you can't play yu-gi-oh at our house }

{ my memories giveaway }

{ welcome, sweet angel }

{ planning a camping trip }

{ tinkering around }

{ happy monday }

{ mother's day recap }

{ guest posting @ i love the way she blogs }

{ working with Love Without Boundaries }

{ easter weekend }

{ camryn's corner }

{ my new venture :: pearsnickity :: }

{ is your smart phone endangering your kids? }

{ camryn's corner }

{ just thought you should know }

{ my love for scentsy : the celtic love knot }

{ celebrate the beautiful }

{ camryn's corner }

{ moms supporting a mom }

{ mommy carnival }

{ camryn's corner }

{ new and improved little piggies }

{ another fantastic CSN stores giveaway! *closed* }

{ happy valentine's }

{ fyi : a bit about myself }

{ camryn's corner }

{ i'm at mmb today }

{ i wish . . . }

{ my healthy, non-workout-or-diet resolution }

{ camryn's corner }

{ reality check : resolution #4}

{ finding the funny everyday }

{ free printable birthday tag }

{ camryn's corner }

{ i'm just gonna do it : resolution #2 }

{ how Brian Regan gave me awesome parenting advice }

{ my christmas card to you }

. . . xoxo

{ the last minute teacher/neighbor gift - peppermint theme }

{ it's a christmas miracle }

{ camryn's corner }

{ giveaway winner! ...and simple snack recipe }

{ csnstores.com giveaway }

{ comfort zone . . . again }

{ some people don't need to dress up }

{ simplifying }

{ a monday mention }

{ where have all the children gone }

{ camryn's corner }

{ a pbs kids life }

{ csn stores . com review }

{ the pantry purge }

{ camryn's corner }

{ lost and still not found }

{ monday thoughts }

{ needing sanity }

{ camryn's corner }

{ a little thought }

{ fairies }

{ camryn's corner + giveaway winner! }

{ a little reminder }

{ clarifying 'the dancer' }

{ camryn's corner }

{ the dancer }

{ camryn's corner }

{ another fantastic CSN stores giveaway! closed }